That’s Ramsey out there reading by the fire, if you can see past the dirty window. He’s already got up, made a fire, cooked the dogs breakfast and made me a pot of hot water for tea or coffee. He might not realize it right now, but my cup runneth over.
Loving someone isn’t about loving them for who they simply are. It’s more than that. It has to be dynamic. It’s about loving who they were, who they are, and who they continue to become every day. It’s about loving them through change and changing along with them. Sometimes it’s even about encouraging change in each other, making one another better people. That’s a real mate, a real best friend, a real love.
When I first met Ramsey, he didn’t much like reading at all. Eventually, I introduced him to some of my favorite authors and topics and he began getting excited about these things. Next thing you know, he’s reading more than me! He’s excitedly going through the thrift store showing me our next new library addition. Now, there he is sitting in the morning by the fire with a book he can’t put down. When I first met Ramsey he snarled his nose at most vegetables. Now, he often takes the role of a vegetarian chef, coming up with new recipes of his own, cooking me delicious meals and asking me to make him some of the classic dishes with more of those veggies please! It’s part change of taste & change of mind, for sure. But that change isn’t always inevitable. Some resist it. But it’s also a display of love. We both know a healthy mind and body are critical to our well-being and we want the best for each other. So, we encourage each other to continually change.
Sometimes people do the opposite. They discourage change in them and their mate. They fear change. I think this is why some of us think we’re better off alone or why some of us end u with the wrong one. If we fear change, we’ll resist it. We won’t want them to change either. It’s often more of a reflection of our own need for growth & change than theirs.
Once we learn to really love anything, we must realize that our love is directed at things that will inevitably change. We have the opportunity to be apart of that process. Not just mates, either. We can encourage our children to become deep thinkers, our parents to be more adventurous, our brothers to be less workaholics, our friends to try something new, and our mates to go for what they love. Rather than be afraid of their changes, we can be a part of it. And with that we’ll be a part of what makes them great and they’ll be a part of what makes us great. I think that’s what a relationship really is. Otherwise, it’s a mere acquaintance.
If people have relationships this way, where change is viewed as an integral part of the relationship, an inevitable part of the journey together, then we’ll make better mates, maybe even better people. We’ll expect change, even encourage it, even embrace it…together.
Life can be an incredible journey. Sure it has its ups & downs, but know this…having a best mate to climb those mountains with & fall down the other side with, makes it all worth while. As I sit here, sipping my coffee, looking out of this window, I can’t help but feel excessively grateful for the changes that have occurred in my life. Many times it was a bit scary but I wouldn’t be where I am now without it.
I love the way my best friend continues to change, with me. And I’m glad I have someone who loves me for who I was, who I am, and who I will become tomorrow. Because when your side-by-side on the adventure, it matters little where you go but simply that you go together.
Our life is surely an interesting one. The landscape is ever-changing in front of us. We do our best to keep each other on the sunny side of the mountain, but even when it gets rough & dark out there, we always seem to grab each other’s hand & go for it, knowing that climb or fall we’ll be in it together. And that makes all the difference.
I love the adventure and the joy of our alternative lifestyle in the road. I always loved the outdoors and a good adventure myself, but I really couldn’t imagine life being as fulfilling as it is these days without Ramsey by my side. Don’t underestimate how incredible it is to share your best moments with a real best friend. The world’s beauty is amplified when you share it with a true mate. And if you’ve found it, that rare thing that it is, never take it for granted. Strive each day to give them the best. Strive each day to change a little together, to take on a new challenge, to never let them feel stagnant, to make their life a dream. For I’ve discovered, in all my journey, in all my ups and downs, that this is what happiness really is.
Thank You, for showing me what happiness is. And thank you for waking me up early, making me a coffee on the fire, and telling me let’s go! We’ve got another adventure to tackle together today. I’m in.